Fallen

Good Health Everyone,

I have become so side tracked with life's little distractions that I have not kept my promise to myself; become healthy. Instead I've been more interested in hanging out and making excuses for not feeding my body whole healthful foods. Consequently, I don't feel good about myself or the health(less) choices I've made. I've been eating everything I swore I wouldn't; ice cream, cake, donuts, cookies, pasta, fried foods, soda, sugary drinks and chips. My want was to avoid as many processed foodstuffs as possible. Instead, I've consumed them with reckless abandon. So, I ask myself, "How do I get back on track?" Like nike, I just do it.

What lessons have I learned? One, I'm easily persuaded and influenced. I've eaten foods, just because people have asked me without thought to consequence. Two, preparation is so important. Having a plan and knowing which foods can be eaten and the time to eat them is invaluable. So now I know I must not be influenced by friends to eat junk and plan the meals that I do eat. The latter is tedious and sometimes inconvenient, but being over 350 pounds is more of a burden.

As far as exercise goes, since I finished my sugar fast for lent, I've been to the gym maybe three times. That's not acceptable. Once again, I make excuses like "I won't have time before work and after work, I'll be too tired" or "If I had someone to go with, it would be much easier." It doesn't matter what the circumstances are, I need to have my ass working out everyday. No exceptions.

So the reason I haven't posted a food journal is because I stopped tracking what I ate. Somehow I felt that if I didn't write it down it wasn't as unhealthy as I thought. Really, I'm embarrassed to report I ate a Monte Christo at one a.m. or a fried chicken two days straight. I feel ashamed because gradually I've allowed myself to become re-addicted to the very same foods that I swore not consume. This past month's battle has been lost, but the war continues. I haven't decided if i will maintain a food journal again. It keeps me very honest when I do, but it's also a lesson in tedium.

I've fallen of the horse and now I have to get back on. I know me, and this ain't the last time I'll be blogging about loosing my way. But those moments will become less and less frequent.

Good Health,
Sam